Oh boy, toddler tantrums are the most frustrating thing to a moms existence. They happen at a moments notice at literally almost everything. Seriously, my toddler threw a tantrum because the wind was blowing too much on her face. Laughing yet? I am chuckling to myself for having to write that.
There are tantrums that make you pull your hair out and tantrums that just make you curl over laughing. I’ll cover both just to keep you laughing on this stressful topic.
Toddlers have these meltdowns for a multitude of reasons. They are angry, hungry, tired, frustrated, or uncomfortable. My daughter and I experienced meltdowns the most because she couldn’t voice what she wanted and I didn’t understand. Meltdowns are an inconvenience and can make you feel like you have no idea what you’re doing. They are however important.
I know that sounds crazy but give me time to explain. Tantrums are a way of voicing how they feel. They are learning how to express themselves. While a tantrum is not ideal, it is a learning experience. A way for you to teach them how to release their feelings and talk it out.
The tornado tantrums
These tantrums are just like they sound. They destroy every ounce of patience you have. You’ll pull out every hair and have to take many breaks because if you tried to be with your child for every minute you’d lose it. That is something we do not want. Your sanity is my goal!
So how does one conquer these catastrophic tantrums? Unfortunately there isn’t a cure all for tantrums because every child is different. Have no fear mama! I have tons of ways to combat tantrums and I’m going to share a few of them with you right now.
As a mama I have tried everything for tantrums. Even the dreaded, giving them what they want. Let me just say that is the worst thing you can in this situation. It may stop the screaming and thrashing but it will happen again and again. Our children are extremely smart and know that they will get their way if they throw said fit.
I have tried so many ways out of the tornado tantrum. Time outs, ignoring it, picking her up, but the only way I have ever gotten out of a tornado tantrum is staying calm and talking her out of it. There are points of no return but yelling or being stern while they are in this tantrum seriously only makes it worse. I learned that the HARD way.
I will say sometimes during the tornado I have to put my daughter on a stool and put her where she can’t see us. If your child is a kicker and roller during the tornado try a room that you can block off and go into the next. It’s only a couple minutes and it allows you some sanity regrouping. After about 2 minutes if she’s still wailing I ask her are you done? Sometimes she’ll say no and keep on keeping on, but majority of the time she says yes. I then tell her if she stops crying I’ll let her out. That’s when we have our little heart to heart and discuss how she can’t behave that way.
The outburst of anger tantrum
These usually only last a few minutes and can be handled a variety of ways. Depending on why the tantrum started you could tackle this with a time out, ignoring it, talking to them, distraction, etc.
My go to way is talking my daughter out of it. It’s the easiest way and most of the time stops it sooner!
So you’re probably thinking yeah right, talking out of tantrum doesn’t work. Talking is simple and done right can turn around a tantrum and stop it from being full blown.
Things I like to say to my daughter to get her away from the edge of her tantrum cliff:
1. Please use your words so I can help you
This one was our struggle for so long because she only knew a few words. However, she realized that if she talked with us, we could help her get what she needed (Within reason of course).
2. I’ll pick you up when you stop crying
Whenever she didn’t get her way she always wanted me to pick her up. I didn’t think about it the first few times but it didn’t help. She was getting her way by making me pick her up. So the only way I’ll pick her up is if she isn’t still crying (unless she’s hurt obviously).
3. Come and sit on mamas lap and talk
This is my favorite! This lets your child know you are here for them. You are present and ready to help them figure out why they are so upset. I do this after every time out. I always explain why she was there and I have her say sorry every time. I want her to know her feelings are okay to have but there is a better way to show them. So we talk it out, well as much as you can with an almost two year old.
The are you seriously throwing a fit tantrums
These are usually the ones that are the most comical! When my daughter starts throwing a fit over things like this, it takes every thing I have to hold in my laughter. Sometimes I really can’t! I have a few favorites one would have to be when she threw a tantrum because I wouldn’t put her shoes on the wrong feet!
Her latest tantrum has been over a diaper. We tried pull ups because she was expressing when she went to the bathroom. The problem is pull ups have minnie on them or a lamb with doc mcstuffins. Regular diapers do not have this and guess what, I ran out of pull ups. We bought Mickey diapers which were fine for a little, until they weren’t. I asked her which diaper she wanted and she said animals so I put on the pampers with animals and she lost her sh*t. I’m talking banchee screech losing it. I couldn’t help but laugh because I was in disbelief!
Toddlers are funny little people and choose to show their emotions at the strangest things!!