The Past Two Years of Motherhood

The past two years of my motherhood journey have been a roller coaster. My daughter is now two guys, someone get me tissues. I’ll probably be crying during this whole post because I cannot believe where time has gone. We have been through so many trials and tribulations but experienced so many love filled memories.

When my daughter was born, if you haven’t been caught up on our journey, she wrecked every idea I had of what my birth would be like. I assumed I’d have a long labor and that I’d get skin to skin right after. Well my daughter had other plans, at a total of 6 hours and 40 minutes she came like a hurricane. We got two minutes of skin to skin and after that I couldn’t hold her for 12 hours. That was so awful for me, if you wanna read more about why read about my birth story here.

The struggles

We have had some serious trials and struggles like weight gain, milestones, RSV, constipation, and crazy tantrums. Weight gain we struggled with for almost four months. My daughter stopped gaining weight and the only thing i could do is blame myself. I thought the lack of weight was my fault since I breastfed her. milestones were up and down. She would crush some and trail behind on others. I have learned one thing, DO NOT compare your child to another. There is no comparison and your child will get there. Listen to your doctor and spend quality time working on the issue.

The worst two out of all these struggles would be RSV and constipation.

RSV is seriously the worst thing, my daughter had a 103.6 fever for almost a week. She only slept and breastfed her for the entire week. I was lucky enough to take the entire week off and lucky that she didn’t need to be hospitalized. What makes RSV so bad is it’s a virus, so no medication can make it go away faster. plus she was a year old at the time so nothing could help her. I had to watch my baby fight through this nasty virus completely helpless. Thankfully it only lasted a week for us but it was the hardest week of my life.

Constipation is something we are still unfortunately fighting with. It all started when we gave her solids at six months. We have had to help her three times going and the doctor has helped her once. She has had two enemas and countless days without going. She would go 3-4 days without pooping and our doctor put her on Miralax. That helped some but sometimes no matter if we kept the dosage right we’d have hard poop or super runny. We could never find the right mix. I tried to switch to natural methods like apple juice, yogurt, fiber, prunes, etc. This was hit or miss but so far I think I found the answer. We are day three and one use of an essential oil blend and she’s pooped every single day. I never thought I’d be so happy to clean poop everyday guys.

The best moments

So here are some of my best moments from the last two years. My daughter showing facial expressions like these beauties:

Her walking of course was an amazing memory! I loved her walking and holding my hand, every time she would reach for my hand to walk my heart would melt a little. Between 1 and 2 years old is when my bond became the strongest with her. We had mommy daughter dates, cuddle sessions, and we were able to communicate so much more.

I was always worried about her talking because at 18 months she said three words but at 20 months she was non stop. Now at two years we are at 3-4 word sentences. My favorite moment with speaking would have to be when she first said I love you too. Every time she says this, I cannot help but smile.

She is my sassy, stubborn as an ox, loves with all her being, baby girl. She tests me so much and stands her ground until she’s purple in the face, literally. However, she is my baby and so sweet. She gives the tightest hugs around my neck and when she gives me these hugs, I am liquid guys. We have had a wicked journey of ups and downs but it has been the most rewarding time of my life. I have learned so many things from her and have grown so much because of her.

To my daughter

If you ever read this, I need you to know how special you are. You will always be my baby and I am so excited to see what the next two years bring crazy girl. You are my life, light, and your daddy and I love you with all of our being. I cannot believe how big you have gotten and I am so glad to be your mother. You are the best thing to happen to your father and I, no matter what we have gone through. Our story isn’t perfect, but it’s perfect because it’s ours.

Love,

Mama