I thought I’d cover this topic because it’s something I deal with everyday, Mom guilt. It’s the nagging feeling that we aren’t good enough as a mom. That every waking moment should be spent with them and we throw ourselves to the wind.
I feel mom guilt for so many things. My top three are her love for fast food chicken nuggets, the cleanliness of my home, and lastly for dropping her off at daycare when I’m off.
It’s kind of sad, my daughter sees the chick fila sign and just starts getting super excited wanting chicken. She usually starts yelling “ni” which is the only way she can say chicken. I have felt awful for her even knowing that the sign means chicken. However, I have been through some dark months lately. We are eating out more than we ever really should have but at least we ate. At least she was fed and happy. That’s one lesson I learned from this time is to cut yourself some slack. Your child does not need a perfect mother, only a happy one.
It’s okay to need a break
I’ve been struggling with this one but we need a day off too. You need some time for just you. To collect your thoughts, shop, clean, read, or whatever makes you happy. Need ideas? Check out my post on self care.
Take a few hours, do a Mother’s Day out program or ask a family member. I’ve stated this in several other posts but your sanity is just as important as keeping that babe happy and healthy.
Mom guilt is a nasty little inside voice we need to squash. It takes time and lots of positive reassurance.
The other day I felt the worst mom guilt. I had maybe three hours of sleep and I was dead to the world tired. I was barely staying awake and laying on the floor. My poor toddler wanted me to do everything with her. I felt awful, so I got her ready for daycare two hours early and dropped her off. I felt so guilty even though I needed a nap in order to work 8 hours. Why do we have this guilt? Why do we think we are not allowed to rest and have us time?
Don’t worry about the small stuff
Don’t worry if your child is on or formula or ate something unhealthy. Rejoice that your baby is fed. Rejoice that you can make that baby smile like no one else can.
Don’t worry if your child is doing what other kids their age are doing. Your child is unique and will do everything when they are meant to and ready. Instead, be more present with your child. Play with them and let them be kids! Just the other day my daughter wore slippers to the store! Let them make messes and relax.
How To Overcome The Guilt
This is simple, I’m not saying ignore all your responsibilities. However, I am telling you to cut yourself a little slack. If you are tired, take a nap when they nap. If you need to relax, do something just for you. Tell yourself you need this break and whatever is bothering you can wait an hour. Self care is vital for mothers and mom guilt stops us from believing we are allowed to take this time for ourselves. There is always something that needs to be done. There is dishes,laundry, lunch prep, homework, and so much more. If we keep putting all of those things in front of our own self care, we run ourselves ragged. Show yourself some grace and take care of you mama, you deserve it.
Enjoy them being little and leave the mom guilt in the trash where it belongs!